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Top 10 Beers for a Hangover

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Related to: Stella Artois
  • #1
    Eel River Organic Porter – You’ve filled your body with toxins, now you can flush them out with this chemical-free organic brew that boasts “just a hint of coffee,” which sounds like breakfast to me.

    by Xean

    13
    votes
  • #2
    Pabst Blue Ribbon – Back in the day, hipsters embraced this brew with such vehemence that it’s sheer ubiquity now dilutes its potency. Consequently, it’s as strong as water, which you need to stay hydrated seeing as most hangovers spring from dehydration.

    by Xean

    11
    votes
  • #3
    Monk’s Blood – This canned Belgian-style brew from San Francisco’s 21st Amendment Brewery takes the “hair of the dog” and turns it into vampire cannibalism with a Trappist spin.

    by Xean

    6
    votes
  • #4
    Lagunitas IPA - True, the extra hops and corresponding upgrade in alcohol might have contributed to your hangover but a pint of this Petaluma-born hop-bomb will at least kill the last surviving neuron responsible for your brain’s “pain” signals.

    by Babyjabba

    5
    votes
  • #5
    Stella Artois – The perfect beer to commemorate last night’s impersonation of Marlon Brando in A Street Car Named Desire. Yes, you belched “Stella!” at the top of your lungs. Consider this breakfast beer your Tony Award.

    by Xean

    5
    votes
  • #6
    Bitburger – The slogan of this German pils, “Bitte ein Bit” or “A bit, please,” was temporarily replaced in the 70s with "Abends Bit, morgens fit,” meaning "Bit in the evening, fit in the morning.” Theoretically, this non-hangover marketing notion could work in reverse – try it.

    by Xean

    4
    votes
  • #7
    Fosters – It’s Australian for “Stay in bed with the shades drawn, trawling Facebook whilst on ‘shame patrol.’”

    by Xean

    3
    votes
  • #8
    St. Pauli (N.A.) – Per 12 fluid ounces, this “number one imported non-alcoholic malt beverage sold in the U.S.” only has 0.5% alcohol. So, next time, consider starting here the night before. If you’re still hungover the next day, it’s time to get on the liver donor list.

    by Xean

    2
    votes
  • #9
    Moonlight Death and Taxes Black Lager – Death or taxes, choose one. Either way your hangover will pale in comparison, which is kind of like feeling better. Kind of.

    by Xean

    2
    votes
  • #10
    Dogfish Head Punkin Ale – This name of this beer likely describes how you feel. Especially since they intentionally spelled “pumpkin” wrong as one might when hungover.

    by Xean

    1
    vote

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